Friday, August 23, 2013

To my Indian sister-in-law




Last time I saw you
was lying in a home for the last-stage cancer patients.
I hugged you and sat myself beside the bed holding your hands,
you had becoming so thin as if only a few bones left...
Trying to cheer me up,
you showed me your swollen legs
‘See, some parts are still fat!’
and you wiped off the liquid coming out of the swollen feet
trying to joke again
‘Look, my feet can sweat!’
I wanted to laugh with you but tears chocked me...


As if it was yesterday,
you made me that delicious Indian curry dish;
As if it was yesterday,
you were still enthusiastic about your ‘Herb Garden’ project 
and starting your own company;
As if it was yesterday,
we were still planning our pilgrim in India together;
As if it was yesterday,
we were still having debates about life and death;
……
It was too soon, 
you are still too young,
 left with so many unfufilled dreams!

Yesterday I misdialed your mobile,
your voice recorded for message was still there,
sounded so familar and so close,
as if you were going to talk to me in any minute......


My dear friend,
Was it hard to depart?
Or were you even mocking at death in the end?
Did your spiritual strength and awareness help you through?
How is it on another side?
...
 With so much miseries and corruptions in this world,
Somehow I can’t tell you which world is better,
 Yours or mine?
Your daughter told me –
that you passed away peacefully,
with all the loved ones around.
 I pictured your spirit dancing in the flame,
 rising ever higher…

The first time I met you in the summer of 98,
My husband and I weren’t married yet,
 then you were my boyfriend’s mother’s boyfriends’s son’s girlfriend,
but you called me directly ' sister-in-law’ anyway.
I was not used to your straightforwardness, 
your loudness, your bossy-ness,
even your scent of Indian curry appeared too intimidating…

At the time you were not aware
 that Confucius hierarchy tradition had made China
and some other neighbor countries very discriminating societies.
(I am not saying, Western world is exceptional, but differs a little in degree.)
At the time I was not full aware of my own judgments 
which had been corrupted as well!

Judgement equals not discrimination .
if right judgments derives from our higher noble mind,
it can save many lives' time of detours and astrays,
so much more can be focused and accomplished in one short life,
if mind can be used wisely.

While discrimination derives 
from the wrong judgments of our lower mind,
mostly being directly or indirectly influenced 
or corrupted by the society we live in,
from the very moment we born into this world.
Unfortunately those imprints left on us causing us actting
 unconsciously discriminating others different from ourselves,
we are trying to rationalize this kind of crazy division system
 from the race,to skin color, to beliefs, to social status...
which means we are keeping feeding nutritions to our ugly egos!
And we wonder why there are so many miseries on earth?!
Why there is no peace in our mind?!

Sitting in the dark feeling your departing spirit,
humbly I ask your forgiveness 
for any hurt I may have caused you by my ignorance;
and at the same time I want to thank you
for giving me chance to be your friend;
As I was getting closer to you, 
I got closer to myself!


You are like Chinese Pu’er tea,
may taste a bit too strong, 
a bit too bitter at the first sip,
but soon the richness, 
the unpretentious fragrance
 will be spreading in the full mouth…


 Farewell, my Indian sister-in-law,
Wait there a little longer,
We shall meet again......



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