Sunday, December 22, 2019

Journey Home




If I haven’t known-
the pain of abandonment
from my earthy parents
Would I have known you-
My divine mother?!


If I haven’t experienced –
the sorrow of unspoken loneliness
even among my crowds
Would I have longed for you-
My soul mate?!


If I haven’t felt-
the bitterness of separation
from my own fragmented soul
Would I have looked for you –
my spirit guides?!...


When the intuition was ignored,
I looked for the eternity from the mortals-
my failure was destined;
When the inner guidance was ignored,
I looked for the unconditional love-
from the conditioned man,
My disappointment was guaranteed;
I did not know any better, then.


What our human sense desires –
may be fulfilled by another human being;
What our higher soul desires –
yet can’t never be fulfilled by another human being
Because , "Human, all too human..."
as Nietzsche put it.


Here is my contemplation for the soon passing year:
All kinds of life journeys –
either successful or unsuccessful
 lead us to the journey back to one’s self in the end;
All forms of relationships –
either good or bad
serve us as transitory lessons to prepare us for
our ultimate relationship with
God/Buddha/Tao/Life force/Higher consciousness
Holy Spirit/Divine mother/Divine father
Whatever you call it;
Whatever you believe in your heart…




Merry Christmas and Happy New Year2020!






Saturday, November 30, 2019

Tears of God



There is a beautiful poem about –
a girl crying over her lost lover…

I was the diamond
You chose the rubies;

I was the ocean
You wanted the rivers;

I was the moon
You chased the stars…


Thus, I keep wondering: If God is conscious,
wouldn’t He/She be tearing over his fallen children?…

I gave you my light
You walked in shadows;

I showed you the path
You got lost in gardens;

I bestowed you with abundance of an emperor
You chose to settle in poverty of a beggar;

I brought you into this life as a child of Mine
You left this place as a child of Man only...






Thursday, October 31, 2019

Lost in translations



I am a translator
I can translate for you-
from word to word intellectually
if you meet me only
in an intellectual space


I am a translator
I can translate for you-
from unspoken words to words
if you meet me in a heart space


I am a translator
I can translate for you-
from the unseen realm to the seen world
if you meet me in a soul space


Having worked with words long enough to understand-
both the power of words and the manipulation of words
with truth being covered by beautiful yet deceitful words;
with essence being hidden under the cloak of the narratives;
with great mystery being lost in translations…

Just like I try to capture the beauty of a butterfly-
by thinking about its biology and its winged ‘engineering’
In that very moment-
I am missing its beauty
I am missing its joy

Just like I try to figure out the mystery of Jesus from Nazareth
by studying his birth facts and memorizing his Gospels
by researching the places he may or may not have been
In that seemingly clever minded space-
I am missing his true teaching
I am missing my own healing

You may have your choice,
I may have mine
You may choose me as your translator
I may choose not to waste my words with you

You may have your will
I may have mine
You may choose me as your translator
I may choose to serve my secrect world to you-
translating the sound of a chipping bird into sweetness;
translating the color of autumn into richness;
translating the passing clouds into sacred meditation;
translating the worldly loss into divine blessings;
translating the tears of your sorrow into the pearls of your strength...

Yet, even the best translator can’t serve you better than you serve yourself
through learning the language of  the universe by yourself
through no translator but communicating directly with your God
There, you answer to your call 
and I answer to mine......





Monday, September 30, 2019

Once I was a beggar


Once I was a beggar-
willing to accept toxic behaviors from my love
I told myself it was out of my royalty
In truth it was out of my own insecurity

Once I was a beggar-
willing to bend over for other’s validations
I told myself that was what takes
In truth it was out of  my low self-esteem

Once I was a beggar-
willing to sacrifice my own desires and feelings
I told myself it was out of kindness and selfishlessness
In truth it was out of my guilt and unworthiness

Once I was beggar-
willing to please or even manipulate others for temporary gains
I told myself I would not have deserved it otherwise
In truth it was out of my fear and faithlessness  

Once I was beggar-
whom was prisoned by my own poverty consciousness mind
My mind has taught me how to cope to be a child of men-
restricted, fearful and feeling lacking...
Yet my mind has forgotten about-
I am also a child of God, a child of the infinity-
free, fearless and forever expansive and abundant…

Flowers don’t stop blossoming-
just because they are unaware of each other’s beauty;
Diamond doesn’t stop being a diamond-
just because it is being covered by the dirt;
Moon doesn’t stop shining-
jut because no one appreiate its light;
You don’t stop being divine
just because no man recognizes your divinity...

As I have accepted myself as a child of man-
Everything in this physical world is materialized for my soul evolution;
As I have accepted myself also as a child of God-
within my human heart there is a gateway to ALL the love existing in the univere 
within my human soul there is a doorway to All the abundance existing in the univere
I have had All the treasures within me all along while I was out there searching for them 
I have had All the love within me all along  while I was out there begging for it ...
Thus, I have stopped being a beggar for good.





Thursday, August 29, 2019

What do you see?



You see a magnificent tree,
But, do you recognize-
 the sun, the rain, the earth
and all the elements attributing 
to its magnificence?


You see someone’s success,
But, do you recognize-
 the tears and sweats
behind its shine and glamour?


You see her beauty 
with your physical eyes,
But, do you recognize-
 her spirit with your inner eyes?


You see the delusions 
in your dreams,
But, do you recognize-
 the delusions in your waking life?...


When I look at you,
Am I looking at-
 a 'shell' housing a beautiful soul?
Or a beautiful shell -
housing an empty soul?


When I speak to you,
Am I speaking to-
the ego self of yours?
Or the authentic self of yours?



When I meet you,
Are we meeting-
in the space of minds?
in the depth of souls?
Or just in the surface of bodies?
……




Wednesday, July 31, 2019

A True Healer




A mediocre doctor will give you
medicine to ease your symptoms;

A better doctor will try to analyze
your symptoms in a more holistic fashion;

An extraordinary doctor will look deeper
for the connections between the physical health
and the emotion or mental health;

Yet a real healer will go even further-
beyond the physical and mental bodies
seeking within one’s soul for
the answer to the root cause of all the symptoms.

Quite often-
A mediocre doctor will be appreciated for his medicine;
A better doctor will be appraised for his knowledge;
An extraordinary doctor will be admired for his insight;
A real healer will yet be resented or even punished–
for pointing out that you are living a life not aligned with your soul purpose;
for saying that YOU are mainly responsible for the manifestations of your illness;
for trying to guide you towards the journey of self healing instead of giving you a quick fix…

It is easier to be relieved by pills;
It is easier to be saved by someone else;
It is easier to blame others or circumstances
It is just too painful to admit to one’s self that –
‘ It is me that have been so caught up in my own ego and the worldly interests;
It is me that have been entertaining those low vibrational people and energies;
It is me that have been ignoring my soul’s promptings for all those years…’
It is so easy to forget that we are more than just physical beings-
we are the beings of trinity(body, mind and spirit)
All three aspects shall be balanced not only-
for the purpose of good physical health but also for the soul ascensions.
Our modern way of living has created very off-balanced human beings:
So much of our energies are focus on our body conscious and mental abilities
The spirit/soul aspect has been largely suppressed or ignored-
the incapability for soul to express itself freely through our body and mind
naturally those energy blocks will be manifested in the forms of physical illness
or mental distress or distortions

A true healer does not think she is better than anyone -
because she understands that healing is everyone’s innate nature;
(Some may have mastered their skills better than the other)
A true healer understands the power of self healing through her healings;
A true healer not only has a kindness of an innocent child
but also the inner strength of a lion!
A true healer is a true warrior, a wounded warrior-
She, who has been wounded time after time
Yet, she has never lost her faith!

She has healed her inner child wounds -
by giving the love to herself even no one else does;
She has healed her own shadows and darkness-
by taming them instead of eliminating them;
She has healed her past hurts and heartbreaks-
by transmuting the energies from negative to positive, from heavier to lighter;
She has healed the suppressed and distorted divine feminine energy-
by honoring both the feminine and masculine energies within herself;
She has healed all the karmic wounds passed down from her ancestors-
by stopping all the old negative patterns at her place…
A true healer as she is will not hesitate to tell you:
Mediate on your soul solely!
(before body, mind and spirit are in total alignment)
Listen neither to your mind nor to your heart
Listen merely to the gentle whispers of your soul






Sunday, June 30, 2019

Stop Battling





I have learned-
If I would give in to the powerful
I may have saved myself from
certain dreadful fates temporarily
But, my spirit would have suffered more


I have learned-
If I would compromise my integrity
I may have gained
some more appraises and success temporarily
But, part of my soul would have been compromised too


I have learned-
If I would behold my mask playing
the games like everyone else
My life may have been easier, at least temporarily
But, my light would have been dimmed more
… …

Often people are busy with battling with each other
while I found that more often I was battling with myself -
between physical and spiritual world,
between my own light and darkness,
between the immediate sense gratifications
and the long soul’s journey…
I have been battling long enough to understand-
how hard this battle can be;
how lonely one can feel at times;
how terribly a genuine seeker can be misunderstood by people
even by those close and loved ones to him/her…


There were those moments that
I felt like a wounded warrior keeping fighting
a battle which was invisible to the outside world-
my body was broken
my heart was bruised
my hands were bleeding
Yet I kept telling myself-
Just try a little bit harder
Just hold on a little bit longer… this too shall pass.
All  pain shall pass;
All confusions shall pass;
All delusions shall pass…


Fighting was necessary.
Struggling was necessary.
(How would knowledge and clarity be gained -
about one’s self otherwise ?!)
Not until I have known my self to a point that-
both my light and shadow
both my Yin and Yang energy
both my physical and spiritual aspects
both my past and future
All opposites can be met in the same place-
ONE sacred place within me
and within each of us...
( There is no contradictory in the opposites-
but to enrich us
if parts of self are not denied;
if energies are worked with instead of against.)
Thus, I stopped battling with myself.