Life is like a series of movies

                  Life is like a series of movies. Even though we are aware that it is just a movie, yet we can’t help with our emotions or feeling joyful, or sad, or angry as the story is unfolding… The thing is if we don’t get our emotions involved, we can certainly avoid the feelings of those negative emotions like sadness, anger and fear, but at the same time those positive emotions would be avoided consciously or unconsciously, because the polarities of human emotions set the tones for our human experiences- how much we are willing to dive into the depth of those negative emotions determines how much we can experience the depth of the opposite emotions, which means if we want to know what ecstasy feels like we have to know what ‘at bottom’ feels like...  if we are here to enjoy a movie, don't we want to experience the movie in its full glory and the rich experience it offers without holding back ourselves?! For the physical part of us, understandably any pain or negative emotion may be unwanted and to be avoided at all costs, yet for the soul/spirit part of us, those are not so unwanted because they can offer a soul with another kind of depth, richness and value added to its soul growth …

               There are already very much of imbalances in human’s emotional bodies due to the past hurts and suppressions from our parents and even from our ancestral lines passing down to us. Those emotional wounds are not less real than the physical wounds, yet due to its hidden characteristics, often it is being treated as less of importance and being brushed aside until our emotional body become overwhelmed and overloaded with the accumulated distressed signals ‘translating’ over to our physical body and also our mental body(they all are intertwisted and interconnected) and manifesting dis-eases in our physical body or our mental body… For too long time emotions have been regarded less of importance in comparison to mental intelligence due to the misconceptions and ideas after thousands years’ human history with more male-dominated patriarchal society which promoted more logical left-brain way of thinking than the feminine way of living, failed to honor the feminine aspects such as emotions and intuition which we humans are much in need of .  Thus, even in today's so called modern people, there are so much discontents and dissatisfactions being built up, and there are so much hunger and longing for the real emotional connection and fulfillment, but unfortunately there are not enough emphasis and right guidance out there for people to lean on especially there are so much of manipulations and fake gurus, teachers out there waiting for exploiting our wounds and weakness…

               I have been down there. Even though I have always had this joyful ‘happy-go-luck’ spirit but people did not appreciate that quality especially at the time, at the place where I was born - everywhere I turned was so much misery- since the whole China was in a stage of exhaustion and paralysis after many years of wars and struggles inside and outside, so many people were much burdened with the basic needs in their life, the mentality of poverty and scarcity was common, and the distorted view of life and psychological aftermath left from their past experiences... as a small child I experienced everything as grey-ish, people often dressed greyish, without color; everyone looked so serious and grey in their facial expressions and even the sky felt very greyish... As misery likes its company but I was not like that in my nature. Everything I was they were not. People even my own parents could not appreciate my strangely joyfulness nature, I guess any sign of happiness was like a reminder of their own misery; they could not appreciate my sensitivity and my uniqueness so I was treated as a black sheep, discredited and poorly treated... So I was very much emotionally traumatized and withdrawn and have taken me years to heal my inner child wounds. So trust me, if I say that I understand your struggles, your sadness, your anger and your loneliness and your helplessness and hopelessness, and I know what it feels like to scream your lungs out but no one hears or no one cares; But trust me also, when I tell you that it does not have to continue to be that way. Though everything happened in my earlier life have set me for a not-so-promising path, even could lead me to a path self destruction, but I did not go down that path. I listened to my intuition and I followed the nudges from my spirit guides and I made a different choice - I have made a path for myself where there was basically no path. I don’t know how you define accomplishment. I have become a person as I am today, still filled with hope, passion and appreciation for life instead of having become a bitter, depressed person filled with anger and resentments towards people and life in general… for me, it is an accomplishment no matter anyone else acknowledge it or not, I no longer wait for anyone to give me that acknowledgement, I have given that to myself! 

             Our emotion health is as important as our physical health, or not even more important. Even two thousand years ago in the book 'Huangdi Neijing黄帝内经' , also called 'The Inner Classic of the Yellow Emperor' has already stated that how the status of human emotions have greater effects on our organs accordingly... since emotions were regarded more as feminine attributes, there are regarded as less desirable traits as we often hear people saying especially to guys like ‘boys don’t cry’, or ‘men should not show emotions’ etc. … this ongoing battle between male and female by disowning, disrespecting and dishonoring the opposite genders is by default a lost battle. It will only cause the further turmoil and imbalance in one’s own energy field because in the end as a soul entity, we all have been incarnated as both male and females in one life or another. A soul is androgynous by its nature, both male and female regardless which one you have chosen as a dominate characteristic to experience this lifetime of yours, so whatever you has disowned, dishonored to another will be done to yourself in one way or another, in this lifetime or next…I hope that for the sake of our children, there will be soon enough focus and awareness on our children’s emotional health(EQ), at least as much as their IQ intelligence in the school and in the society, and also raising the awareness of our way of parenting our children: What do we want for our children? An intelligent one? A happy one? A both? If can’t both, which one should we prioritize?... Those questions should be answered by each of us, should we keep doing what we have always been doing without questioning? Or is it time for change, not only for our children but also for ourselves?!

              Yes, life is like a series of movies. There is a delicate balance which each of us struggles to reach. Too much of getting involved, you may have the risk of losing yourself in the role you are playing; if not getting involved at all, why are you even here for?! How will you ever know the height of ecstasy if you don’t know the depth of sorrow? How will you understand the sweetness of love if you have not understood the brokenhearted? How will you ever desire the freedom of your spirit if you have not become undesired for the bondage of your bodily form… I guess, you would not have chosen to incarnate into this physical plane if you just want to be a non-physical watcher only. So please have some gratitude towards this life you have been given regardless how it seems imperfect in your eyes! Simply because you CAN, and you still CAN breathe, can feel the cool air flowing into your lungs and energize your whole body and feel the aliveness within you; because you still CAN smell the freshness of the grass and still CAN touch and embrace your loves ones and friends with your arms and your loving eyes… and you still CAN use your physical senses to experience the richness of life offered to you in all its splendor and richness…So be grateful, even towards those you have perceived as negative ones! For those, which have enriched your life and probably have grown you most…

            There is no need to be fearful for the negative emotions or experiences. Our physical body can’t help feeling what has been felt. But don’t judge yourself too harshly for what you have felt or what you have done or not done… it is what it is- just an experience. You have this or that feeling, but you are not your feeling; you have done this or that, but you are not your story; YOU in your essence are beyond all of this or that! So at any given time you can choose to re- connect with your soul, your higher self, or your spirit guides or angels(whatever you believe) to shift from your normal worldly view to a higher point of view, in order to see the bigger picture and to be able to appreciate who you are and where you are at once again... In that way, you will never astray too far from your destined path and you will gradually gain your self confidence and more importance you will gain a renewed sense of hope and faith for your life! Because in truth, by you alone, you can change your entire story as you so choose. There is no real victim here, each human is creator for his/her life story- a happy ending as you desire( hard work is needed of course, no pain no gain) or a sorrowful and  regretful ending as you choose to keep your mind stuck in your own created illusions of victimhood or scarcity… 

             You probably have heard about that the earth is a school, indeed it is. Just as the schools on earth, there are kindergartens, elementary schools, high schools and universities for different levels… each soul is meant to go through different levels of 'schooling' to learn the lessons to further its soul journey. If one particular lesson is not learned, you have to redo it and master it until your soul/higher self is satisfied in order to move to a new level. There is no judgement or punishment from God/Goddess or our divine Father/mother(whatever you prefer), the only judgment is your higher self, your own soul/spirit will judge onto yourself… Each soul entity has its own uniqueness, its own strength and weakness and at different level of its soul journey, there is no need to judge or to compare  with other souls- ‘In the end every road leads to Rome and every path leads us back Home’! Please understand this soul journey is not easy for anyone, each has different sets of challenges and blessings, even for those old advanced souls who we today may name them as star seeds or lightworkers. Their initial missions were to bring new energies of love, joy , courage and peace to this much needed earth, to assist earthlings’ consciousness evolution, to bring them back to the God’s unity consciousness, and to raise the unity awareness for the mother earth and all the beings living in it… Yet when those brave yet sensitive souls underestimated the heavy pull of the dense energies on earth, things can get of hand as well. When their sensitivity being mocked and ridiculed, their kindness and empathic nature being taken advantage of, their uniqueness being ostracized and their initial passion for humanity can be at risk of turning into depression, anger and resentments, totally disconnected from who they really are, and what they are here for, and some even get corrupted by their own ego … So brave souls, watch out! Please armor and anchor yourself with the warrior light firmly first before you set out to help the anyone else,  otherwise you will be pulled down and drowned yourself before you could help anyone …

             In the spiritual community, there are often a lot of talks about those ideas about unity consciousness and the Oneness- all the dark and light energy is the same One energy, all the good and bad is just the two sides of the same coin. It is absolutely right, after your consciousness has evolved into such a level- it is supposed to be a natural process of evolution into this so called unity consciousness, it can’t be forced or manipulated in any way. For example, it is like innocence. It is easy for a baby to be innocent, but it is not easy for an adult to be innocent especially after being bruised by people and life- the first innocence is natural, the second innocence is an accomplishment! Same with the unity consciousness, we can’t acquire or even understand what the unity consciousness is all about until we have gone through the different stages of separated consciousness. We have to be brutally honest with ourselves by acknowledging our shadows and darkness in order to heal and transmute those distorted energies within us. Before we are at the point of unity consciousness, we must acknowledge first we are NOT there. Please don’t run away, dear warrior souls, face your own demons head on! You will be surprised one day, those ‘ demons’ you have identified in you was merely some distorted energies within you which just need your attention, care and unconditional love... Once they being healed and transmuted, those ‘demons’ can even turn into your greatest alliances!!

            Yes, life is like a series of movies. When we are watching a good movie, with all the dramas going on the screen, at that moment everything seemed so close and so real to us, we got totally immersed in its story we laughing or tearing like fools… yet if we step out a little, we might notice that all the dramas are no more than some projections from the light beams onto the screen, nothing is real(Could it be possible the real us, our higher selfs are light beings out there projecting all its creation and dramas into some kind of holograms we humans called it reality...? Just an interesting thought.)    … So please remember to step out or step aside, from time to time, to recheck and realign with our soul and our highest purpose: What kind of story are we telling about ourselves and the others? And what kind of story do we want to create for ourselves and the others?... Eventually this shall be answered by us each in facing our Maker, soon or later.

 

 

(Note: Routinely I meditate a few minutes before starting to write, I wrote down whatever my thoughts were taking me at the moment, which I would like to credit to my beloved spirit guides and their nudges and inspirations... Dear readers, right now I can only dedicate one or max. 2 hours per month to write my blog for you until maybe that I become a full-time writer one day, until then please understand that I have a normal life to live and I may not have the time to edit my writing to its perfection… but hopefully my message is forwarded to you successfully nevertheless. My blog is totally non-profit, I try to share my thoughts and my experiences with you, because I have to do so, because it is written in my soul...Love)

Contemplating on the teachings of St.Germain

                              

                             Man is divine if he so choose the company of the divine;

                              Man is evil if he so choose the company of the evil;

                             This divine truth has been taught by all the mystics 

                             crossing continents throughout the ages...

 

Contemplating on the teachings of the beloved ascended master: St. Germain

                Each is a universe onto itself. You and your own imaginations can create the dimensions which you are living in. I am responsible for the creation in my universe, you and yours. I can fill my universe with my beloved gods, angels, ancestral guides, and my beloved ones, and with all the beauty, harmony and abundance… you can fill your universe with anything you desire. This world will be always filled with good, bad and ugly, but what I shall take from this world to create my own world is up to me, and your world is up to you! So between you and me, we may be living next door only a few meters away from each other in a physical sense but many worlds apart on a spiritual plane.

                It is NOT what we do determine our success, our title or our job but our energy-the state of being which affects our environments which we are unconscious of most of the time. When we start to be responsible for our own energy and what we send forth towards the environment we are living in. That is all we come here to do, by transforming our own energy, then the mother earth will be transformed accordingly, instead another way around.

               In the future there will be better understanding that the royalty has nothing to do with one’s blood, type, bank account but one’s own cultivated energy-one’s soul truth. Other things are just illusions and maya. Since the nature of the body consciousness is always fearful-fearful for pain, hunger and sickness and death while the soul/spirit is forever fearless. It has always served the ruling class well to manipulate people’s fear for controlling. From treating the inflicted pain to one’s body, imprisonment, prosecution, punishment even death to make people bend to their will… so tell me, where is the royalty in all those?!

Judge Not...

 

 

             Sometimes I can’t help myself wondering what it would be like to live all by myself, off grid, in solitude, in silence, turning away from all the noises from this human world… at the same time it feels that my soul has already known the answer somehow – You have done that before in your past lives, don’t you remember…? Yet the soul remembrance of that bitter sweet solitary existence still pulls my heart string at times, especially at those times of feeling disappointed, misunderstood and feeling more lonely in the midst of a crowd than being alone all by myself… because I know how people can judge each other while the birds don't, the trees don''t and the rivers don't…

          I remember in my earlier years, how people tried to warn me by telling me the terrible stories  about the dangerous animals, the dark forests and deep water, and the monstrous evil spirits… that I could be hurt, taken away or even killed by those ferocious visible and invisible creatures if I did not listen to the grownups and follow their guidance for protection…Yet my entire childhood reality has revealed me with different stories – I have never been hurt by any dangerous animals, dark forests nor any evil spirit(on the contrary, may have been saved and protected by the kind spirits which I can tell in another time); On another hand, I have been so hurt by my fellow humans, by their unkind words and careless actions even those who claimed to love me, to protect me yet have wounded me most … Oh, how can people be so judgmental even though they know so little about you?!I wondered and wondered...

…If she is a girl then she can’t be anything more than a good wife or a good mother;

If she has a pretty face then most likely that she doesn’t have much of a brain;

If she looks young and childlike then she can’t be possible wise or be taken seriously;

If she is soft and sensitive then she can’t be possible strong or has what it takes;

If she is playful and lighthearted then either she knows nothing about sorrow or she must be a real fool;

If she likes fashion and enjoys beautiful things then she must be materialistic and she can’t be possible spiritual;

If she is spiritual then she can't be intellectual and probably she is witchy worshipping the devils;

Or, if she is beautiful, good, virtuous and wise then she must be a too-good-to-be-true-bitch there must be  something really evil hidden under her sleeves…

           It has never ceased to amaze me that how people work with their judgments. If they would like, they can find reasons to judge you for being less of them then their egos get little boost; and at the same time they can also find reasons to judge you secretly for being better than them because their egos get intimidated… Do you remember how this kind of ego played out about 2,000 years ago? How the crowd chose Barabbas-a notorious criminal over Jesus for the crucifixion…?! It breaks my heart every time when I think about it – when people made that choice, they actually had chosen their egos over their souls! Because a lesser being satisfied their pathetic egos while the virtue and the light of Jesus reflecting their own darkness and wickedness in comparison which hurt their delusional egos… So be aware, while you are dealing with a man in his/her soul, be kind and loving with your soul to his/her soul; while you dealing with a man in his/her ego, just run away as fast as you can!

         Though as an adult today I can handle judgments much better since I have understood that people’s judgments say much more about themselves than anyone else, but it still can hurt. For many sensitive souls like me, those careless unkind words or unjust actions from the others can cut so deep into our sensitive hearts even causing the long effect of disorientation and fragmentation in our souls which may take a lot of conscious self love and self care work to have those wounds healed…

           As a child, I was too sensitive and emotional for my own good. I could easily pick up the energies around me and especially the emotional energies which this trait was not much of a blessing but more of a curse for me at the time of being a child. So quite often I picked up and mistook other’s emotions as my own, I got sad, angry, frustrated and overwhelmed for no apparent reasons according to the others. For example, once I followed my father to a local open market to buy some meat, Chinese love so called 'fresh and alive' food. As soon as I entered that place, I got immediately overwhelmed with what I saw, heard and smelt... No kidding, I was hearing the screams and cries from those waiting-to-be-slaughtered animals like chickens, ducks, fishes, pigeon and everything else you can imagine… when my eyes laid upon a newly- throat-cut duck being hanged upside down, the fresh red blood flowing down on her white spotless feather, her body was twitching dying while people were standing by laughing exchanging the money stained with her blood… I burst into tears uncontrollably, people stopped wondering what was wrong with me. My father felt so embarrassed and angry at me being such a drama queen in a public place… afterwards my father never took me back to that kind of market again and I gladly not.

           I kinda realized that I may be too sensitive for the environment I was living in, even to my own family which contributed much of the misunderstanding and wrongful judgments towards me. It was hard for me as a vulnerable child even though I can see the bigger picture in all of those today-that I was supposing to channel in some kind of new energy and new way of thinking into an established but stagnated society; that I was made not to fit in but to serve as some kind of catalyst for the old outdated minds; that it was not meant to destroy me but to make me stronger in my own faith; and that I had gone though was not meant to be a punishment from any God but a chosen path of my own soul… of course, it is always easier said than done. We all know, as long as men live in their egos, they don't appreciate a catalyst even it has the great potential to grow them; and they don't like either their darkness and shadows being mirrored back to their faces which they have been trying to hide desperately because the truth can be really uncomfortable at times…

             Looking back at myself, it has taken quite some time to heal my inner child which its nature was very sensitive, intuitive and happy-go-lucky initially but was carelessly and deeply wounded by people especially during my childhood, with all the negative emotional energies I constantly picked up around me, with the overwhelming sense of pain within me caused not only by the physical illness but also by being subjected to the emotional abuses almost on daily basis… I know I should give more credit to myself for the work I have done for me, for that my heart has not become harden because of those negative experiences; that my optimistic attitude for life has not faded away because of those tough experiences; that I have not lost my faith in the Spirit and my soul journey after all those obstacles if not even more strengthened... Because today I can see clearly where I was once before- the very very bottom! I was made to believe that I was the worst daughter, the ugliest, stupidest and the most unlovable girl in the whole world…  and I have even prayed that I would sleep and drift away painlessly without having to wake up the next morning so I could stop being a burden, being an annoyance to people, and so all the pain I felt in my body and in my heart would stop hurting so much…

         Today people are still judging but I have stopped judging myself at least. I try to choose to be joyful and lighthearted as often as possible, not because of being judged as naïve or unrealistic , but simply because I have had enough of sorrow and heaviness in the past; and here I share my personal journey with you, not because I need your attention or recognition, but simply because I know what is like to be in the dark feeling meaningless, helpless and hopeless, and how a few kind inspiring words can sometimes mean so much… Remember, dear souls, if there is no one there giving you a shoulder to lean on, lean on your own spirit for strength instead; if there is no one giving you a hand, give yourself a helping hand instead- be your own best parents if you have to; be your own best friend if you have to; be your own best cheerleader if you have to...

          But please don't turn to anyone or anything(drugs or addictions) which may give you temporary relief but dis-empower you and make you feel more powerless and helpless in the long run; and please don’t spend too long time in sorrow,  in blaming, in negativities or dwelling in the past because your time here is too precious to waste and plus whatever you spend your energies in will persist; Instead, please try to turn your energy and focus inwards – reconnecting with your own soul and reconnecting your soul with the All- knowing and All-powerful Spirit. When you no longer identify yourself as only a limited physical being but as a soul entity, and knowing that you belong to that All knowing and All powerful Spirit family once you align your own individual soul with the Spirit! Imagine that kind of unlimited power- no one and nothing outside of you can truly hurt you unless you allow them. You can have the whole Spirit family with you from your angelic guides, your ancestors guides to your spiritual teams all are standing right behind you and ready to connect with you giving you guidance and support(warning: Just make sure your soul's will is aligned with their good will in order to manifest successfully, otherwise any misusage of divine spiritual power will eventually bring much of karma upon yourself ) ... So stop viewing yourself as a victim under some unfortunate circumstances because you are NOT! You have all the power to change your life, all by yourself! and at any time! If you don’t like what you have become, what you have manifested, you don’t need to die waiting for your next reincarnation to fix something, to restart something new , to change your life. You can do that right NOW, in this lifetime!!!

            In truth, if viewed above from your soul (your higher self) point of view: In order for you to know what a true unconditional love is, you must know what is NOT- by going through the experiences of heartbreaks, false love and conditional ‘love; same with the inner alchemy, in order for you to recognize your own power, your soul would prompt you to manifest the opposite experiences first which is to feel powerless, helpless and hopeless…So seen from the grander scale, everything happened and happens are for us , not against us! If you are willing to change your mind about yourself, the whole game of your holographic manifestation will be changed forever…

         It has been always our mind, our ego mind keeps us trapped in fear, from reaching our highest potentials. When we put ourselves in a box and live out the entire life within that box, defending the stupid honor of being consistent no matter how unhappy and miserable inside…hopefully in the near future, people will embrace more the nature of their souls- the multifaceted-ness and the multidimensional-ness; and people will appreciate more of those who have mastered and integrated the different energies of dualities or multifaceted-ness within them instead of settling with their one or two dimensional existences... Souls don’t have ego, they don't need the medal of consistency. They just want to experience what is like to be feminine and also what is like to be masculine without fearing of being labelled or judged; the souls just want to experience what is like to be a boss and as much as what is like to be childlike; the souls just want to know what the actions are about and as well as what the silence is about… It is we humans who have become rigid and boring, we limit ourselves to certain roles, certain archetype standards, certain codes of behaviors yet deep inside having the knowing that we have limited our own creative potentiality and we have failed to express our souls’ true desires which can cause the sadness and bitterness of unfulfillments inside our souls...As all misery loves company, it is exactly that unfulfilled, unhappy parts of us usually make us so eagerly ready to judge at anyone who dares to live outside of the box, who dare to be happy and free...

        So dear souls, there is time for work and there is a time for play. Put down your usual role for a while; put down your silly ego for a while; put down the judgments for others as well as your own, just feel the warm breeze of a sunny day, smiling at people as if they are your dear old friends, chasing the butterflies and rainbow as if you were a child again… after all, summer is here… Happy Summer!

the Mystical Union

 

I remember ,

Long long ago I had a beautiful dream.

In the dream I felt so cradled and loved-

by an ocean of Great Love endless and limitless…

I was loved for all my perfections

as well as all my imperfections;

I was loved for my strength and accomplishments-

as well as my weakness and vulnerabilities;

I was loved not just for my body or my intellect or my virtue;

I was loved for who I AM, the totality of ME;

I was loved without judgment or condition or any aftermath;

I was loved with total acceptance and total freedom…

 

Yet, When I woke up to this world  with so much excitements-

yet with so much confusions and disorientations,

sometimes this so called reality felt more like a dream to me-

or more like a nightmare which I couldn't wake up from…

Lifetime after lifetime I was in and out of this world,

Though I have had glimpses of love –

which had some resemblances to the Great Love once I knew

but many more times with the complications followed by

sorrow and disappointments like terrible shadows hidden behind of the claims of love as I became familiar with-

People claimed to be my protector yet abandoned me when I needed them most;

People claimed to be my friends yet stabbed my back when the interest was in the play;

People claimed to love me yet betrayed me with all kinds of excuses and conditions...

 

Oh, how much tears shed are called enough?!

Oh, how many times of heart breaks are called enough?!

Oh, how many lifetimes of repeating the cycle are called enough?!...

The kind of human love can be so desirable yet so challenging;

The kind of human love can be so wonderful yet so painful;

The kind of human love can ease my thirst temporarily  -

yet it can never quite quench the thirst  within my soul-

even though I was not sure  what I was looking for at the time

but I have had the inner knowing all along that there is more to everything for sure …

I should have known better but I did not always act better as blinded by love-

As people can only understand me at the level of they understanding themselves;

So people can only love me at the level of they loving themselves -

more than that, simply can’t.

 

It has been always my own stubbornness-

that I couldn’t let go of the desire of re-experiencing and re-creating

the dream of that perfect Love even on this physical plane-

there is remembrance of 'heaven on earth' buried deeply in my soul consciousness-

 which I knew it is possible even everyone else told me otherwise...

So I kept seeking

So I kept dreaming

So I kept fighting ...

But instead of feeling moving closer and closer to my dream 

I watched my dream moving further and further by the reality of the world;

I watched my life force slowly draining away to a point of exhaustion-

my body had become too weary to take another punch;

my heart had become too broken to take another sword;

my soul had become too burdened to take any more karmic burdens…

 

In that breaking point of trying to save my own sanity,

I withdrew my energy from the outer world and returned to myself-

especially the unloved part of me, the wounded child in me..

So I was forced to re-evaluate all my attached ideas and beliefs

about myself, others, life and about my goals and dreams…

In that breaking point between my past, present and future

Unexpectedly things started to move again,

I could sense the restoring of my energy level day after day -

as if all the energies used to project outwards started to be pulled back to me;

I could even feel the restoring of my soul fragments in many subtle ways-

as if all the soul fragments lost in time and space started to be called back to me…

 

And the most unexpectedly thing was-

my previous visions started to come back to me-

like an old flame reawakened by the wordless words whispering in my dream:

‘My Beloved one,

If you could see what we see

If you could know what we know

You would never doubt again if you are loved or not…

You came from the ocean of the infinite Big Love(not the small human love),

You were made from the eternal divine love (not the fleeting human love),

There has no need for you to seek love outside of you in order to feel complete,

because you are already that Love

and you are already complete…

 

It is your human mind-

which make you feel the need to venture to different worlds in order to find your way home;

It is your human mind-

which make you feel the need to go on far land pilgrims in order to find your lost love;

It is your human mind-

which you glorify so much in your world has caused major downfalls for many earthly souls;

It is your human mind –

which make you unable to see through the veils because often it stands in your own way of perceiving the Truth- as you are falling in love with all the glittery gifts bestowed upon you but you could not perceive the Giver, the bestower behind all the gifts… HE/SHE (God/Goddess, Divine father/mother)/the Spirit (whatever you prefer the name)desires to be loved by you unconditionally as much as you desire to be loved unconditionally- not to love HIS/HER gifts but also love HIM/HER with all your heart… because this HE/SHE is the greatest LOVER behind all the lovers, in this world and in the beyond …

Thus no matter how long and how far you has journeyed away from HIM/HER, deep within every soul there is a grand divine design of an individual soul innately seeking for its union with its Maker- the great Spirit HE/SHE, seeking for returning to its source, to its original status of being - feeling that eternal peace and blissfulness in that endless, limitless ocean of Love of the Spirits… This is called the soul's homecoming in many ancient esoteric traditions - the mystical and the sacred union between the individual Soul and the All-knowing, All-loving Spirit...

So my beloved one, you would not believe-

How long, how patiently we have been waiting for your return-

that how many more times to have your heart broken to realize your own value?

that how many more lessons you have to repeat to release all your attachments?

that how much more time to exhaust yourself -

 in seeking the love outside of you which is already inside of you?!...

When you are ready to face the truth who you really are and where you are really going,

When you allow the Spirit take lead of your mind, body-

your soul will be released from the prison of your mind and your body, finally.

Your soul comes alive again- rejoiced and utterly free 

Your soul comes home again- long sought after reunion... 

Only when you have come to the term of the sacred union  with yourself- 

all lost parts of your selfs (your light and your shadows, your soul and the Spirit)

then you will be able to truly come to terms with the union of the human love-

Good or bad- all adds to the colors and the fullness of your soul in the end...''

 

 

 

 

 

The Great Spirit

      Man is a child of both heaven and earth. Man is a being of both body and soul/spirit. Both aspects need to be balanced and both consciousness need to be honored, otherwise man will fulfill only half of his truth, another half of his truth will remain unknown, undiscovered and unfulfilled... Accept or not, in the end, what is of the matter(physical) will return to the matter, what is of the spirit will return to Spirit.

         There is nothing wrong to enjoy the physical aspects of life, if it is inspired by the entity’s inner spirit.  If inspired by the ego mind, those physical experiences can go easily wrong, ended with all kinds of sensory addictions and worldly attachments which will lead us to further identification with our body conscious and further oblivious of our soul/spirit conscious... To me, this forgetfulness of the Spirit, this disconnection of a soul entity from its source is the root of all the fears and sufferings in human experiences… Indeed the human body is a previous gift from the Divine to every entity, through this vessel that the great Spirit, or God/Goddess, or Allah, or Brahman whatever you prefer to name the nameless, so to experience its own physical creations and to express its infinite creativities through the physical vessels... When a soul entity is aligned with the great Spirit, and the entity’s body conscious is aligned with its spiritual conscious, this entity will be able to execute his full divine expressions creatively and courageously in all areas of his physical life, without fear, without holding back because his soul has that deep knowing that he is anchored firmly in the great Spirit and his soul is a part of the infinite ocean of the great Spirit from which is of the blissfulness and home-belonging in eternity, and having that deep inner knowing that he is never alone and have left his real home… the illusions of separation are caused by the identification with the body conscious, which there is ending at the physical death which once again is caused by the fear from the body conscious… thus it is pretty honest to say that body conscious is always fearful because of the fear of its own mortality while in the other hand soul/spirit is always fearless because of its knowingness of its immortality and eternity… So dear ones, please meditate and meditate often on your this truth instead of selling yourself short unconsciously and regretfully, lifetime after lifetime.  

       We all are the children from the great Spirit having this ‘earthly school/vacation’ with different expired dates- or reuniting with some old friends in physical forms; or more serious about paying off some karmic debts; or learning some lesson for its soul growth; or having a divine mission to assist the ascension of the human consciousness; or simply having some fun and bringing some fresh and lighter energies into the dense-energy earth realm… unfortunately due to the karmic law, most of us even those who are spiritually highly evolved got ourselves tangled and stuck in the karmic wheel lifetime after lifetime and the soul memory of our divine origin started to fade more and more... So whatever your situation is right now, please mediate on your soul purpose and make the most of it! Respect and honor your physical vessel as a holy temple, leave and stop all the negatives and toxins outside of your temple, make it fit for housing the great Spirit… when this divine connection is firmly established within yourself, you will feel fulfilled, blissful and at all-time peace regardless how the world outside of you perceives you otherwise…

        When a man is completely identified with his body conscious, he will be forever bounded to the fear due to the very nature of the body conscious- always fearful. Fearful for being weak, being old, being hurt, being sick and death... furthermore, the fear has been greatly exploited against each other throughout human history, especially those were and are in the position of power, to manipulate the fears in people to serve their power and other egoistic and selfish agendas...As we know, our history book is written by the winner, but do we really know at what cost?! Behind the glories of the kingdoms, all the kings, queens and leaders, behind all the hierarchy structures and patriarchal social systems, how many of those were accomplished by the manipulation of fear- through inflicting physical abuses, punishments, prosecutions, imprisonment or even death onto anyone who posed the threat to their power and authority…?!  Today in the west so called free and democratic countries, there are other forms of manipulations, which seem less aggressive and less visible comparing to the past bloody punishments and killings but it uses the same principle and serves the same purpose of  manipulating and controlling/mind-controlling through selling the images, ideas even lifestyles so people are willingly to give up their power and their spirits to their cravings and addictions...pretty smart right?! Sometimes I wonder what has been stamped as heresy or wrong, or bad by the authorities may contain more of the truth than what has been presented to the general public, at least it should be questioned and relooked at with an open mind.

          Even at very young age, I was very interested in things like different religions, spiritual and metaphysical, mystical topics which was very unusual and weird at my age and with comparision to other kids so I suffered psychological greatly from being different and being ridiculed and not accepted even by my own family... To make a long story short, I have finally accepted who I am, even those weird parts of me simply because I can't hide my own truth and I can't deny who I am- I can't help it. I am what I am! For a simple example, if I have an inner urge or promting to write down something, I have to do that otherwise I will be 'ghosted' in my dream next a few days until I write down...don't be freaked out. It is quite normal and natural for me, during the most part of my life I have felt more loved, understood and protected by the Spirit than by human beings...  Back to what I wanted to say about my curiosity with Christianity and the Bible during one period, to be honest, it raised more questions and doubts in me than the answers I was looking for, and also I got bored with reading the Bible pretty quickly. I don’t know if you feel the same, that quite often those supposed-to-be-authoritative kind of text books were used the difficult languages as if it would not be authoritative enough or intellectual enough if common people would understand easily, or in this case when the Roman emperor Constantine summoned his council to decide what should be in the Bible and what should be left out for best serving his interest. No one really understood Jesus’s real teachings, so they interpreted his metaphoric meaning literally and made some fancy alterations here and there according to their igorance and delusions  …  two thousands years later, many of us still follow these 'holy' words from the Bible faithfully without any questioning which this phenomenon reminds me of the story of ‘ The Emperor’s New Clothes’- the crowds were pretending and applauding for the naked emperor who had no clothes on whatsoeve out of courtesy, or hypocrisy, or fear… 

         As I know, it has been quite a common strategy that a ruler would combine the political power with the religious power for the maximum effect on his people, so it was done by the emperors in China as well. The emperor was not only declared as a heir after his royal blood line but also he declared himself  as‘Tian Zi天子’(Son of Heaven). So if he was a chosen one from the Heaven to rule a kingdom, who dare to question his total authority and his superiority over the others?!... Of course, you may say that no one knows for sure what really happened with the Bible -Jesus was crucified and many of his disciples and followers were prosecuted or killed, and I guess many original scriptures were probably destroyed … so you can have your opinion and I can have mine. The little twist here is that just when I decided that Jesus was not my guy after having read the Bible, I changed my mind completely when I encountered with the ancient Dead Sea Scroll (found in Qumran caves in Judaean desert )and the Nag Hammadi gnostic texts( found in upper Egyptian). Since both discoveries were around year 1945, many think it was a great coincidence but I think differently since I am a believer of divine time and synchronicity, the time has come! It is about time for the truth to come out into the open, to expose the another version of Jesus, a more esoteric gnostic version of Christianity which contradict very much to the established orthodox Christianity… but because generally speaking the collective today are more open minded and more acceptable, and because the availability of the internet which make information more accessible to people…as I see it as hypothesis. it is the divine time. Regardless, I remember how excited and emotional I became when I read those words for the first time, it woke up something deep inside me which I knew well once as if finally I came to this reunion with an old dear friend which I thought I have lost long ago… Here I want to share a few verses from the Gospel of Thomas (one of the scriptures found from the Nag Hammadi) with you, to see if they too can trigger something within your soul memory as they did to me…

(3) Jesus said, "If those who lead you say to you, 'See, the kingdom is in the sky,' then the birds of the sky will precede you. If they say to you, 'It is in the sea,' then the fish will precede you. Rather, the kingdom is inside of you, and it is outside of you. When you come to know yourselves, then you will become known, and you will realize that it is you who are the sons of the living father. But if you will not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty and it is you who are that poverty."

(29) Jesus said, "If the flesh came into being because of spirit, it is a wonder. But if spirit came into being because of the body, it is a wonder of wonders. Indeed, I am amazed at how this great wealth has made its home in this poverty."

(39) Jesus said, "The pharisees and the scribes have taken the keys of knowledge (gnosis) and hidden them. They themselves have not entered, nor have they allowed to enter those who wish to. You, however, be as wise as serpents and as innocent as doves"……

        I just love this Jesus- a very different version of Jesus from the Bible! What a controversial and bad-ass spiritual teacher he was!!! Can you imagine what kind of threats he posed to the authorities at his time by such daring kind of teaching?! This version of Jesus was served as a catalyst in breaking not only the social hierarchical and patriarchal structures at his time but also in breaking the collective conscious pattern of ignorance and destruction which have been keeping repeating... So most likely Jesus was crucified for the heresy, for his teachings of esoteric knowledge about the Spirit, instead of dying for our sins according to the church patriarchal (so we will be bounded by our guilt and unworthiness forever, so we will be forever depending on the church and the priests for our redemptions…) Just imagine, if we are taught that no one outside of us can really save us but ourselves and  ‘all the redemptions’ can be done through our own inner transformation by realigning our own soul with the Spirit … What do we need the church for?! What do we need the priests for?! What do we even need any authority outside of us to tell us how we should behave and how we should live our lives…?! You see, the real truth has such an immense transformtive power which threats the very core of the old power and structures in all areas religious, political and social etc., so by default it should be destroyed at all costs according to those who are in the positions of power and who have sold their souls to the devil... As the Maslow pyramid theory exists in the material world, so it is in the spiritual world. Before each soul entity reached its Christ consciousness, or you may call it unity consciousness which is beyond any duality, any division of darkness or light, before reaching that point, the struggles between the light and the darkness, the good and the evil are as real as in the spiritual world as in the physical world unfortunately... Light energy wants to break the structures of power and set the imprisoned energies free while dark energy wants to suppress and control so those two energies have very opposite interest. As a soul entity, please choose your side carefully, one simply can’t serve two masters at the same time.

         It is interesting that many of the mystics cross the different cultures and continents, either Christian mystics like Qumran Essenes, or Islamic Sufi mystics, Indian mystics or Zen Buddhists or Tibetan yogis  despite of all their differences and appearances, their core teachings remain incredibly similar to one another- all about knowing thyself, the Spirit(may with different names)-our divine origin; all about the triumph of the Spirit over the physical; all about the inner transformation and inner alchemy; all about taking back our own power instead of giving the power to others who claim that they know better than us… and they all agreed upon the great mystery of the Spirit which lives inside each of us and waiting for the ultimate release from the repression of the body conscious in order to express its great power and creativities... As ironic as it goes, the conditioned love has many faces and shapes while the unconditional love has only one, so it is with the truth. There are many so called ‘truth’ out there, but the real truth is only one! (which any soul entity will be able to recognize once its ego and delusions being discerned and put down)... As the Persian mystic poet Rumi says: ‘ Know that the body is merely a garment. Go seek the wearer, not the clock’… So keep meditating on the wearer, not the clock.

           As long as the evil force is greater in the collective consciousness, the truth has to go underground for the time being. I am a believer that eventually the power of good will always triumph over the evil, the light over the darkness and the real truth can never be destroyed or hidden for long… so if you seek open-minded and wholehearted, what you are seeking will be seeking you… We are who we think we are. We can only live on the level of the consciousness as far as the level of our understanding goes, further we can’t. Eventually we will become what we draw upon us, what we choose to align with- if you so choose to worship the devil, HE will become your God; if you so choose to worship Love, Love will become you God. So choose wisely.

             Each entity has been given the equal opportunity to manifest its creativity in this physical world. So it is out of your own free will, you can either choose the red or blue pill as in the movie Matrix. Yes, it is your free will but you have to live up with the consequences of all your choices and decisions. For example, if you as a soul entity came into this incarnation with certain soul purpose, but during this journey you keep chickening out over and over again because of your own fear and insecurities when the tough situations presenting to you… thus your higher self, your soul/spirit will conspire the similar situations and people to your life again and again until you get it right… I am not saying it is easy, it is not easy for anyone because everyone has his/her sets of challenges and weakness. Some older-soul- entities may learn their lessons faster with just a few lifetimes, many have to repeat their karmic wheels for thousands or even ten thousands more lifetimes… that is why we say that the evolution of human consciousness is a very slow process… Please keep it in mind: there is no one outside of you will judge you but your own soul. You might think that an injustice can get away sometimes in this physical world but no injustice can get away under the universal karmic law and your soul will always know this truth… Dear ones out there, you may or may not agree with what I am trying to say here right now, but I am speaking to the part of you which understands me… Here is to you all out there seeking with thirst for the truth- and the truth shall set you free…

Don’t let your body move you the way it desires,

Fear will be always with you;

Don’t let your mind move you the way it desires,

Doubts will be always with you;

Let the Spirit move you the way it desires,

Peace will be always with you…

So be it.

 

 

 

P.S. The places where I used ‘He’, ‘His’ has no gender preference but for the simplification of using both‘He/She’, ‘His/her’ all the time:)

Flower Sermon

       

         One day, Buddha gave a wordless sermon to his disciples. He sat there with a white flower in his hand, he just smiled without uttering a word. All his disciples were confused and could not understand what Buddha meant or wanted to express except one disciple called Mahakasyapa, he understood the message so he smiled back without saying anything either… all was communicated and understood between them, without a word…

         We are who we are. And we are at where we are supposed to be. If you are there where I am, you will understand me without me explaining much myself to you; if you are not where I am, you will not be able to understand me no matter how hard I try to explain myself or how hard I prove myself to you, you won’t understand me…because in the end, all the relationships in our lives are merely the mirrors of who we really are and where we are at…nothing is personal.

You, who see the kindness in me have already the kindness within you;

You, who see the beauty in me have already the beauty within you;

You, who sense the wounds in me have already the wounds within you;

You, who see the separation in me have already the separation within you;

You, who see the divinity in me have already the divinity within you…

We are truly each other’s great mirrors… nothing is personal.

 

As Jesus says in the Gospel of Thomas( verse’70)

‘ If you bring forth what is within you,

What you have will save you.

If you do not have that within you,

What you do not have within you will destroy you.’

So be it.